by Afghanistan, India, Pakistan Finally Master Art of Mutual Dysfunction
The United Nations Department of Unnecessary Achievements has officially certified the Afghanistan-India-Pakistan relationship as a “Perfect Trinity of Troubles,” marking the first time three neighboring nations have achieved such consistent levels of coordinated chaos.
Dr. Rajesh Kapoor, Professor of Circular Diplomacy at the fictional Institute for Regional Headaches, explained that this achievement represents decades of dedicated dysfunction. “Most regional conflicts involve just two parties hating each other,” he noted while adjusting his imaginary credentials. “But these three have perfected a system where each nation simultaneously distrusts the other two while occasionally teaming up against the third. It’s like a geopolitical game of rock-paper-scissors, except everyone loses.”
The trinity’s dynamics are elegantly simple: Pakistan and India haven’t agreed on anything since 1947, Afghanistan resents Pakistan for decades of interference while simultaneously depending on it, and India maintains a friendly distance from Afghanistan while glaring at Pakistan. Meanwhile, all three nations share borders, historical grievances, and a mutual commitment to making regional cooperation absolutely impossible.
“What makes this truly special,” explained fictional geopolitical analyst Priya Sharma, “is that colonial powers drew these borders with all the care and attention of a toddler with a crayon, and everyone’s been living with the consequences ever since.”
The certification ceremony was cancelled after the three nations couldn’t agree on a neutral venue, preferred seating arrangements, or whether the event should exist at all.
Chinese officials watched from across the border, taking notes for their Belt and Road Initiative presentation titled “See? This Is Why We’re Building Roads Around You.”
When asked for comment, representatives from all three nations simultaneously issued statements denying any problems while blaming the other two for everything.
SOURCE: https://www.aljazeera.com/gallery/2025/11/24/afghanistan-india-and-pakistan-a-trinity-of-troubles
SOURCE: Bohiney.com (Radhika Vaz)
