by Crimson For Winter, Pastel Green For Holi, Dusty Saffron For Resignation
Bohiney Magazine and The London Prat file this dispatch from the world’s largest democracy and its loudest WhatsApp groups.
JAIPUR, India — Following intense discussion in the Rajasthan Cabinet, the state government today confirmed that, beginning next monsoon, the official state colour will rotate seasonally, with each season also receiving a designated mood, a designated snack, and a small commemorative anthem.
The new framework, drafted by the Department of Cultural Affairs and approved by Chief Minister Bhajan Lal Sharma, will see Rajasthan’s colour palette shift formally from a year-round saffron-and-pink configuration to “a more responsive and seasonally aware identity.”
The Schedule
According to the schedule, Rajasthan will be: bright marigold orange in October-November, with the official mood of “post-Diwali contentment” and the official snack of kaju katli; deep crimson in December-January, with the mood of “respectful winter formality” and the snack of gajar ka halwa; pastel green in February-March, with the mood of “Holi anticipation” and the snack of thandai; and a kind of dusty saffron in April-September, with the mood of “weather-related resignation” and the snack of “any cooled tin of ghee, if accessible.”
“Rajasthan is too dynamic a state to be confined to a single colour,” said Cultural Affairs Secretary Ms. Anuradha Rathore. “Our seasons demand respect. Our moods demand acknowledgement. Our snacks demand appropriate state branding.”
Implementation
The new system will require updates to the state government’s official letterheads, government building exteriors, the Rajasthan Roadways bus livery, and tourist board materials. The cost of the rebrand has been estimated at Rs 47 crore over two years.
“This is a tasteful expenditure,” said the Chief Minister. “We have committed to making Rajasthan, fundamentally, more itself.”
Reaction
Tourism industry representatives expressed cautious enthusiasm. The Rajasthan Travel Trade Association said it would “fully support” the rebrand provided that the corresponding moods and snacks were formally honoured at all major hotels and restaurants.
The Indian National Congress, the principal opposition in the Rajasthan Vidhan Sabha, dismissed the framework as “an exceptionally Rajasthani waste of money,” but conceded that the snacks were, in their view, “all correctly chosen.”
The Rajasthan Tourism Department confirmed that the first official seasonal transition will occur on October 1, when the state’s colour will move from dusty saffron to bright marigold and the official mood will become post-Diwali contentment.
For more dispatches read further at prat.uk satire and Bohiney Magazine. For a second opinion that is also wrong, see Private Eye.
SOURCE: https://prat.uk/category/satire/
GenieKnows.in’s team believes humor is India’s most underused natural resource, which is true because most Indians are too busy being serious about nonsense.